Was He Wrong for Pretending Not to Recognize His Parents When They Tried to Reconnect?

A Reddit user shares his story of being raised by his aunt and uncle after his parents abandoned him and his reaction after they tried to come back into his life.

Mommy and Daddy Issues

The original poster (OP) explained that they were raised by their aunt and uncle. Their older sister had developed a pretty serious illness when OP was six years old and their parents found that they could not take care of both of them. They left OP at their grandparents’ house, and their uncle took them in after that.

Their parents never explained what was happening, they just told them they were going to visit their grandma for a while and never came back. Both their uncle and his grandparents were unhappy with what OP’s parents had done.

OP said that after that, they only saw their parents about five times and then not at all for the last nine years.

When OP was twelve, they realized that they were the only one putting effort into reaching out, so they decided to stop contacting them. OP said everything turned out okay, though, because their uncle and aunt were never able to have children, so they called OP their miracle child. They formally adopted OP when they turned 18.

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The Past Always Comes Back to Haunt You

After OP’s sister passed away between Thanksgiving and Christmas, OP’s parents tried to speak with them at the funeral. OP stayed in the back of the crowd and made sure they could leave before their parents could get the chance to talk to them. They then tried to call OP’s uncle to talk to OP, but OP said he wasn’t available.

OP’s parents were finally able to try again at Christmas midnight mass when OP went with their grandmother. OP’s parents sat behind them, and OP said they could feel them staring. After mass, OP’s parents attempted to approach them and hug them. OP backed away and pretended not to know them and said, “Sorry, do I know you?”

They said, “We’re your parents!” and OP replied, “My parents are at home.” On the way out of mass, OP’s parents approached again and said, “You really don’t recognize us?” and OP said, “Oh, are you my dad’s brother? I think I remember you from when I was little.” OP’s grandmother thinks their parents deserve what OP did for trying to come back into their life as if nothing had happened.

OP’s parents wrote them a long letter about how hurt they were and how OP should have understood that they tried to do the right thing. They also said that they would always be OP’s parents and that OP couldn’t change that. Some of OP’s other relatives think they were too harsh, but OP doesn’t think their parents should get a pass because they suddenly remembered OP now that their sister had passed away.

Was OP right to pretend they didn’t know who their parents were? Should OP’s parents have taken a different approach to reconnecting? How would you have reacted in this situation?

This article was produced and syndicated by Mama Say What?!