A stressed sibling recently posted a Reddit board to determine if she had acted poorly in pointing out the hypocritical rules at her sister’s wedding.
A New Mother
This 26-year-old woman recently became a mother; her son is currently four months old. He’s the only grandchild on her side of the family – he’s spoiled rotten by his family, they all love him, and he loves them.
Her sister has been planning her wedding for a while. During the early wedding planning stages, her sister joked about having a kid-free wedding.
The original poster (OP) didn’t think she was being serious, as it was a super early planning stage. However, when her sister sent the wedding invites out, they stated it would be a kid-free wedding.
A Kid-Free Wedding
This invite shocked her, and she went to talk to their mom about it. However, her mom stayed neutral as she didn’t want to upset either of her daughters.
The OP didn’t try to talk to anyone else about it and said she obliged and found a babysitter because she isn’t the argumentative type. She felt upset but tried to be supportive – after all, it was her sister’s wedding day!
A few months later, the wedding day comes, and she and her fiancé arrive and take their seats in the crowded waiting hall.
While waiting for the ceremony to start, she noticed her cousin sitting behind her with her three-year-old daughter. The OP felt shocked!
After it had been clear that this was a child-free wedding, seeing her cousin sit there so brazenly was crazy to her!
Her Cousin Didn’t Listen
She was sure that her family (who adored her sister) would say something to her cousin, but to her shock, everyone greeted them nicely and talked about how cute her three-year-old was. She felt appalled and knew this would upset her sister.
At the reception, the OP went up to her mom and asked her what she thought about her three-year-old niece being present at the wedding, despite it being kid-free.
Her mom said it didn’t matter much and that she should just let it go, but the OP was furious! She couldn’t see how this was fair at all, especially after she had to get a babysitter for her child.
Her sister had hired a photo booth for the wedding, so she went with her cousin and sister later in the evening to get their photo taken.
After the photo, she turned to her cousin and jokingly said, “I guess “kid-free wedding” means different things to different people!” Her cousin was visibly shocked and looked at the bride sheepishly.
But instead of chastising their cousin, her sister told her to knock it off and that everything was fine. The OP replied, “why should I? I followed the rules and left my son at home!” Her sister told her to calm down, but the OP told her sister that she was calm but confused.
The altercation drew attention from some of the other guests, and their mother came over and pulled her aside. She told her daughter to stop causing a scene, but the OP replied, “I’m not causing a scene. I’m simply asking why different rules apply to different people?!”
She Caused a Scene
Her sister interjected, told her to stop, and said she was ruining her special day. She couldn’t believe her sister had said that! She was so angry that she grabbed her fiancé and left – she couldn’t even stand to be in the same room as her sister.
Since the argument at the wedding, her mom has been pushing for her to apologize to her sister. However, she thinks that her sister should apologize to her. She hasn’t spoken to her sister since the wedding and doesn’t plan on it until she gets an apology.
She wasn’t initially mad at her sister but more upset at her cousin for bringing her daughter and her family for not saying anything when they saw the child.
However, because her sister got annoyed when she brought it up, she’s upset with her sister. She feels like she deserved to let her cousin know how she felt, and because she followed the rules, her sister should have supported her!
She wants to know if she was wrong.
Was She Wrong?
Redditors did not take this woman’s side. The verdict was overwhelmingly she was not in the wrong. They thought she was plainly in the wrong for starting a conflict with her cousin, especially considering they were at her sister’s wedding.
The top-rated reply said, “You want an apology because you weren’t special enough at her wedding. If the bride didn’t want to confront the cousin, you had absolutely no business saying [anything], “jokingly” or not (hint: you weren’t joking. This is evident by the hissy fit you are still throwing.)”
Another Redditor echoed this sentiment, saying, “YTA. Someone else broke the rules. You created a scene because you didn’t also get to break the rules. None of that is on your sister.”
What do you think about this story? Should she have held back in chastising her cousin?
Featured Image Credit: Shutterstock / HBRH. The people shown in the images are for illustrative purposes only, not the actual people featured in the story.