This mother sought advice from the Reddit community after her son’s future in-laws asked her for the money she was going to use for the wedding – instead of paying for the wedding!
More Money, More Problems
The Original Poster (OP) write on a Reddit thread, asking if she was being inconsiderate for paying for her son’s wedding and not giving any money to his fiance’s family.
A Gift for the Soon-to-Be Married Couple
OP, a 46-year-old woman, offered to pay for her 24-year-old son’s wedding to his 23-year-old high school sweetheart, “Bianca” (name changed for privacy).
OP and her husband are financially secure and able to afford the cost of the wedding.
Although her son offered to cover half of the cost, OP suggested that he save the money for their honeymoon instead.
They Asked the Other Parents for Money!
The problem started with Bianca’s parents.
They both insisted that OP’s son and their daughter didn’t need a wedding and that OP should give them the money instead because they were about to be evicted from their rental home.
Son-In-Laws’ Unbelievable Behavior
OP never got along with Bianca’s parents. Seven months ago, their older son passed away in a car crash.
He had been the one paying all their bills and rent. He left them all his money.
OP said that instead of grieving their loss, they complained about not being able to go on vacation this year.
They Spun Every Lie They Could
Bianca’s parents kept reaching out to OP, stating that Bianca would rather they be able to live comfortably than have a wedding.
Great Lengths to Get Money
OP did not tell Bianca about this conversation and decided to block her parents from reaching out again. The parents kept creating fake numbers to try to talk to OP.
Bianca has never given money to her parents and has limited contact with them.
OP said Bianca still wants them to come to the wedding because it would mean a lot to her since they always wanted to see her get married.
The Tip of the Iceberg
OP says the final straw came when the parents called OP a bad parent.
OP wrote that the parents claimed she was “babying” her son and that if she truly loved him, they wouldn’t be forcing him to have a big wedding because he struggles with social anxiety.
They Decided Themselves
The parents went on to tell OP that they should just let their kids get married in a courtroom or just have a very intimate wedding with only a few family members present.
Telling the Truth
OP says that while her son is scared of the wedding and all the social anxiety he has about it, he still can’t wait for the big day.
He said that he’s waited his whole life to watch Bianca walk down the aisle and for them to stand side-by-side at the altar.
OP states that even Bianca is aware of her fiance’s anxiety and has offered to just file paperwork instead of throwing a party.
He Is Committed to Seeing It Through
Again, OP’s son is committed to seeing the wedding of his fiancée’s dreams come true and has told OP that he is willing to do whatever it takes to get through the big day.
While OP is reassured her son wants the wedding, she is still annoyed by Bianca’s parents’ request to skip the big wedding and help them financially instead.
Reddit Users Weigh In
Many Reddit users completely agreed with OP’s take on the whole situation and agreed that she should see it through to throw the couple a big wedding.
“They are doing what they want. It seems like they are happy. As long as your kid wants the wedding, you are good. I’d block Bianca’s family and move on.” one user commented.
Another comment went on to say that even if the couple had decided to throw a smaller wedding, Bianca’s parents should not be entitled to the leftover money.
They stated that there is absolutely no reason that Bianca’s parents should be receiving money from her daughter’s soon-to-be in-laws.
Another user warned OP to continue to keep an eye on the fiancée’s parents. They wrote, “The fact that they were more concerned about losing out on vacation than losing their son really says it all. Unless they both have some sort of disability preventing them from supporting themselves, they are solely responsible for their own circumstances. All things considered, your son is a saint for still inviting them. I suggest you keep a close eye on them at the wedding should they try to guilt-mooch from the honeymoon fund.”
What do you think? Should OP give money to the fiancee’s parents?
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