A fed-up man stirred outrage and sympathy on Reddit after he told his parents that he would not change his life to take care of his sister. Giving up his childhood for her was more than enough. Here is his full story.
She Needs Constant Care
OP is a 35-year-old man who has a 33-year-old sister. She has a syndrome that requires constant care, and she’s been that way since she was born.
They Dumped It on Him
Growing up, OP’s parents dumped a lot of the caretaking responsibilities on their older son, who is now 42 years old.
The Burden Was His Now
When his older brother moved out of the house at 17, OP had to pick up the slack and start helping with his sister. He was just 10 years old at the time.
His Childhood Was Over
From that point until he turned 18 and left home, OP was never allowed to participate in extracurricular activities because his parents and sister needed him at home.
He Couldn’t Go Out
And OP’s parents wouldn’t let him go out after school, either, even though they went out with friends a couple of times a week.
They Had Friends, Too
Their reasoning was that OP got to see his friends at school all day, while they only got to see theirs twice a week.
He Had to Watch Over Her
Naturally, it was OP who had to stay home and take care of sister those nights when his parents went out for a little fun.
They’re Still After Him
These days, OP avoids talking to his parents at all. Every conversation turns into them trying to force him into becoming his sister’s full-time caregiver.
They Got Spooked
Recently, OP’s father had a health scare. And, though he recovered, the incident spooked him and his wife.
They Wouldn’t Last Forever
They suddenly realized that they wouldn’t be around to care for OP’s sister forever. So they started making arrangements.
She Was on the List
The first step was to get OP’s sister on a waiting list to move into a residential care facility.
He Was Their Plan
To address their more pressing concerns, though, OP’s parents turned to him. And they had a plan.
He Needed Some Practice
OP’s parents explained that, since his job could be done from home, he needed to start taking care of his sister on certain days. That would help him “practice” for when he had to take over full time.
He Cut Them Off
OP stopped his parents right there and told them he was not going to be caring for his sister.
He Wants a Career
For one thing, OP has no intention of working from home. He wants to advance in his career and believes he needs to be in the office every day to make that happen.
He Has a Life
For another thing, OP also wants to have free time for his hobbies and to socialize with friends.
They Just Didn’t Get It
OP’s parents were very disappointed in his response and said he was being selfish. They told him he wouldn’t have time for outside activities once he was his sister’s primary caregiver.
He Wouldn’t Give Up Anything Else
But OP repeated that he wouldn’t be caring for his sister. And then he told his parents that he already gave up his childhood for her and was not willing to give up anything else.
She’s Not His Responsibility
Redditors overwhelmingly support OP’s position and agree that it’s not his job to take care of his sister.
Many point out that, while the whole situation is terrible, OP’s sister is not his child. They think his parents have taken way too much from him already in the name of caring for her.
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