This latest tale comes hot off the Reddit presses. A dad at the end of his rope wanted to know whether he’d been a fool for giving his daughter an ultimatum.
The Original Poster (OP), a 37-year-old man, is married to a 38-year-old woman. He has four kids, aged 17, 15, 14, and 12. Since she started high school, his 14-year-old daughter started having some behavioral issues.
Odd One Out!
His 14-year-old daughter is their youngest child, she attends the same high school as her older siblings and they’ve never had these types of behavioral issues before.
Their 14-year-old daughter is completely different from their other children. In fact, she is quite the bully at school.
It started in the first few weeks of school: she got in trouble for making a homophobic comment to a gay male student. When OP and his wife found out, they were appalled!
Therapy for a Bully?
They punished her but also got her therapy. There are also other situations that could be considered bullying in the past, such as being mean to her siblings or teachers, but nothing against other students… until now!
She’s Bullying Again!
About a week ago, they got another phone call from their daughter’s school. Their daughter and her friends had been starting to be rude to their classmates again – specifically the boys that got her in trouble for picking on the gay male student earlier in the year.
They Got the Lowdown
Luckily OP’s nephew is in the same class as them, so they were able to get the whole story. They were initially worried he’d sugarcoat it because he’s close with his cousin, but he didn’t; he gave them the entire story.
Persecuted for Pajamas
OP’s daughter’s school has a very lax dress code and allows kids to wear pajamas in school. Currently, it’s freezing out where they are, so the boys in the group were wearing pajamas to school.
Too Cool for Baseball
But his daughter mocked these boys, calling them “unclassy” and saying they were “childish” because their pajamas had baseball designs on them!
A Witty Response
OP asked his nephew about the boys, and his nephew said they’re the nicest guys in school. They’re popular athletes, and when OP’s daughter was saying this to them, they told her to stop acting like the fashion police and started laughing at her.
She Wanted to Get a Rise Out of Them
This annoyed OP’s daughter and she kept getting more offensive in order to get a reaction – hence the school phoning OP, as she’d started disrupting classes.
They Were Shocked When They Looked at Her Phone
As these events have unfolded over the last few days, OP confiscated his daughter’s phone.
They were dismayed when they looked at it and saw that she and her friends had been bullying people inside their school and people they’d met online!
The school is currently investigating her and her actions online.
It’s Our Way or the Highway
OP and his wife have sat his daughter down and given her an ultimatum. They’ve told her to apologize to the boys, promise not to bully again, and right her wrongdoings.
If she does this, she’ll get her phone back and be allowed to vacation with the family over the summer. If she doesn’t, however, they’ve threatened to transfer her to another school.
Girls Will Be Girls!
Their daughter has constantly complained to her siblings and grandparents about this. A family conflict has arisen as a result, and the rest of the family has said that he’s going too far, and that “mean girls usually grow out of it.”
They want OP to let his daughter improve naturally through therapy and internal motivation, but OP isn’t sure this hands-off approach is correct.
The rest of the family shouldn’t want his daughter to get off scot-free, as they don’t know the scope of his daughter’s behavioral issues.
He Thinks They’re Being Fair
OP doesn’t think there is any justification for homophobic remarks and that the ultimatum they’ve proposed is entirely fair, given the circumstance. After all, it’s not like they’ve threatened to kick her out!
But His Daughter Won’t Talk To Him
His daughter still won’t talk to him or his wife. He’s looking for an outsider’s perspective on the situation.
Reddit users thought OP was doing his best to tackle his daughter’s behavioral issues.
They agreed that therapy was the right step to take and thought it was crazy that the rest of the family had said, “mean girls usually grow out of it,” as that means that her current victims would have to wait for her to gain some emotional empathy before she realizes she’s wrong for bullying people!
One user said, “Sounds like they’re flipping the “boys will be boys” excuse into “girls will be girls.” Either is abominable. They grow out of it when there are consequences.”
What do you think about this story? Should this distressed dad be more lenient towards his daughter, or is she a problem child that has gone too far?
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The post He Reprimanded His Black Sheep Child for Being a Bully. He Has Zero Tolerance for Homophobic Slurs. The Family Say He Is Being Too Harsh first appeared on Mama Say What?!
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