Jordan recently found himself tangled up in a situation that left him wondering if he had messed up somehow. He wanted to share what happened and get some insight from others.
Sabz’s Skin Care Routine
Sabz, Jordan’s girlfriend, was someone who paid great attention to her skin.
She spent money on various creams, oils, and masks, believing they helped keep her skin healthy.
Respectful Differences
While Jordan didn’t necessarily agree with her approach, he respected her choices, even if he thought those health store products were a waste of money.
It was her money, after all, so he didn’t make a big deal out of it.
Jordan’s Apartment
Sabz also tended to be quite particular about certain things, especially when it came to Jordan’s apartment.
Jordan’s Perspective
He shared his living space with housemates, and while they weren’t the neatest bunch, it’s not like they were living in a complete mess, either.
However, Sabz disliked any clutter or untidiness, even minor things like a sweater on the floor or dishes in the sink.
Attention to Detail
She frequently reminded Jordan to be more organized, which could sometimes be a source of conflict between the two.
An Invitation to a Friend’s Wedding
Now, let’s get to the heart of the story. Jordan and Sabz received an invitation to a friend’s wedding.
Since Jordan lived closer to the wedding venue, Sabz stayed the night at his place. However, this brought about the usual challenges with Sabz’s standards.
Clashes in Living Standards
Jordan had had a long day and decided not to take a shower that evening.
Sabz, not being a fan of this choice, voiced her complaints, but Jordan assured her he’d shower in the morning.
A Difference of Opinions on Hygiene
Morning came, and as they were getting ready for the wedding, Jordan opted out of showering again.
This time, it wasn’t due to exhaustion but because he overslept. He thought a quick wash of his face, some cologne, and deodorant would suffice
. But Sabz wasn’t having it. She protested and called him gross for not showering.
A Disagreement Escalates
Jordan was annoyed, and he told Sabz that it was just as gross that she didn’t shave her legs!
Societal Expectations
He felt that it was a turn-off and even referred to it as “disgusting!” He mentioned how she didn’t wear makeup or heels, which he thought were things “normal” girls did.
Going to a wedding, he believed there were certain expectations to meet.
Shaving vs. Hygiene
This, of course, triggered a disagreement between them. Sabz stood her ground, stating that not showering and not shaving was not the same thing, especially considering that societal norms don’t require men to shave their legs.
She argued that it wasn’t fair to equate the two. In an attempt to emphasize her point, Sabz changed her outfit from slacks and a blouse to a dress that ended at her knees. This only made her legs more noticeable.
Jordan’s Mom Was On Sabz’s Side
Things got even more complicated when Jordan talked to his mom about it. His mom took Sabz’s side and said that Jordan was the one who messed up.
Jordan just couldn’t believe how this whole thing had blown up, and he felt like he needed some outside opinions. That’s why he turned to Reddit and asked, “This is ridiculous. Am I being a jerk?”
Misogynistic Attitudes
Redditors didn’t hold back in expressing their opinions, and the consensus was clear: Jordan was being a jerk. They pointed out that Sabz had a valid point – not showering and not shaving leg hair aren’t the same thing.
One is about hygiene, while the other is about personal preference, and they thought Jordan didn’t understand the importance.
Unpacking Gender Norms
Some users were incensed by Jordan’s comment suggesting that Sabz should wear makeup or high heels because that’s what girls are “supposed” to do, labeling it outright misogyny.
Respect and Acceptance
They advised Jordan to find a new girlfriend who conformed to these norms rather than trying to change Sabz into someone she wasn’t.
One user said, “LOL… you think going to a wedding requires legs to be shaved but NOT to have your stinky butt reeking of unwashed grime and covered by cologne (that’s a nightmare sewage of a smell) showered? You actually think basic HYGIENE isn’t required for a wedding for you. But aesthetic grooming is for her. My. You are SUCH a jerk.”
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The post Gender Norms at Play: He Skips a Shower but Expects Her to Shave Her Legs for a Wedding – Who’s Right? first appeared on Mama Say What?!
Featured Image Credit: Shutterstock / Master1305. The people shown in the images are for illustrative purposes only, not the actual people featured in the story.
Source: Reddit