A Reddit user asked the community if they were in the wrong for telling their fiancée that they could not depend on them if they were ever in a life-or-death situation.
A Strong Sense of Self
The Original Poster (OP) believes that they possess a strong sense of situational awareness and are able to think quickly without panicking in dangerous situations.
Contrasting Partner
In contrast, OP’s fiancée seems to lack awareness of potential danger in their surroundings and tends to panic and scream when faced with difficult situations.
OP notes that his fiancée’s survival instinct is comparable to that of a panda raised in captivity.
A Dangerous Situation
On Friday, OP and some friends went on a boat trip, which ended up in a dangerous situation due to unexpected high winds and waves.
She Was Scared Out of Her Mind
While OP and the other men on board tried to secure the boat and prevent it from capsizing, OP’s fiancée became hysterical and started screaming and crying.
She kept yelling that they were all going to die, and she blamed OP for inviting her on the boat.
None of the Others Acted Like This
None of the other women on board reacted in the same way, despite being equally scared.
OP believes that they tried to keep their emotions in check for the sake of the men’s efforts to handle the situation.
They Did Their Best in the Situation
During the 15-minute downpour that endangered their boat trip, OP’s fiancée wailed in fear while OP and the other men did their best to manage the situation.
They Were Embarrassed
Although they made it back safely with only minor damage, OP was embarrassed by his fiancée’s behavior in front of their friends.
The behavior was not only unhelpful and distracting but also telling.
Having a Tough Conversation
On the way home, OP decided to talk to their fiancée about her conduct during the crisis.
He expressed his concern that he could not count on her in a life-or-death situation.
She Needed to Learn to Calm Down
OP told his fiancée that she needed to learn how to stay calm and be helpful instead of adding stress to the situation.
She Became Defensive
However, his fiancée became extremely angry and defended her behavior, claiming that she was scared and had reason to panic
They Argued the Whole Way Home
Despite OP’s explanation that everyone was scared but nobody acted as ridiculously as she did, they argued throughout the ride home. His fiancée is still angry with him.
OP Wanted to Get Ahead of It Now
OP believes that it was important to express his concerns to his fiancée regarding her behavior during the boat incident, given their plans to build a life together and start a family.
Was OP in the Wrong?
OP feels that he cannot be the only level-headed person in the relationship.
Clarifying the Situation
In an edit, OP clarified that the other women on board did not help during the crisis because they lacked the experience to do so, not because of their gender.
The men on the boat had been out together many times before and knew what to do in this situation, so it was safer for everyone if the women stayed calm and out of the way until the problem was resolved.
Reddit Users Weigh In
Several Reddit users commented on the situation. One user believed that OP was not the jerk for confronting his fiancée about her unhelpful behavior during the boat incident.
The user argued that remaining calm in a crisis is a valuable skill, and the fiancée’s behavior only made the situation more stressful.
Others advised OP to approach the situation with empathy and understanding, rather than assigning blame and guilt.
What do you think? Was OP in the right for talking to their fiancée about this?
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The post He Told His Fiancée to Learn to Chill Out! He Can’t Count On Her in a Stressful Situation if She Is Always Hysterical! first appeared on Mama Say What?!
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Source: Reddit
