In a viral tweet that has ignited a heated discussion, Charlotte Proudman, a 33-year-old barrister from London, has urged pregnant women to reconsider the tradition of giving their child the father’s surname. Here’s the full story.
Mothers’ Emotional Burden
The barrister explained the journey of pregnancy and childbirth, saying that mothers bear the physical and emotional burden for nine months and beyond.
She wrote, “A message to pregnant women – please give the baby your surname.”
A Mother Is Responsible for Her Child
“You carried a baby for nine months, gave birth, and will be responsible for that child for the rest of your life. When you’re registering the baby ask yourself: why is the father’s surname more important than yours?” she added.
There Was Support
The tweet quickly went viral with several users supporting the argument.
This is Not a Small Thing
Those who support Dr. Proudman’s perspective said that the choice of a child’s surname should not be taken lightly.
Empowering the Child
They highlighted the importance of personal identity, suggesting that giving a child the mother’s surname can empower the child with a strong sense of individuality and connection to their maternal lineage.
“I made this mistake. When I got married I wasn’t sure whether to change my last name or not to my then-husband’s last name. I really wanted to have the same last name as our potential children so I just changed my last name to ‘make things easier’ so all of our last names would match,” one user wrote.
The Societal Norm
The user added, “I just went with the norms because it was ‘easier’ (easier for who???). In hindsight and with all that transpired my kids would’ve been much better off if I had kept my surname and given it to them as well.”
Many Mothers Have Done This
Another user commented, “I did this! If my babies’ dad and I get married we’ll reassess, but I figured I was more likely to take them abroad alone, and his surname shouldn’t be the default.”
There Were Critics
Critics of Proudman’s perspective argued that the choice of a child’s surname should remain a personal decision, driven by the individual circumstances and beliefs of the parents.
Is the Father Not Important?
“So no more child support then? Seems fair since your assertion implies the man is not important or responsible,” one user commented.
No Need to Pay Child Support?
Another user wrote, “Then why do men need to pay child support? Lol. I would love to debate with you on this one. My body, my choice, my last name, but a man’s bank account is attached no matter what.”
Just Give the Best Names
“Kings, if she gives your child her father’s name, the child automatically becomes her father’s responsibility,” one person wrote while another user commented, “I think whichever surname suits the baby best? If the baby is going to be called ‘Olivia Harrison’ or ‘Olivia Hickenbottom’ – go with the first… or perhaps if it’s a boy take the father’s surname, if it’s a girl go with the mother’s surname?.”
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The post “Please Give the Baby Your Surname”: Barrister’s Controversial Message to Pregnant Woman Saying She Shouldn’t Give Their Baby the Father’s Surname first appeared on Mama Say What?!
Featured Image Credit: Shutterstock / fizkes. The people shown in the images are for illustrative purposes only, not the actual people featured in the story.
Source: Lad Bible